Those Three Words Are Said Too Much, They're Not Enough

It's a rare song that connects so deeply with me, invigorates ideas, thoughts, spurs emotions, makes me wonder about things. Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol does this for me. I love the lyrics, but in truth, its placement in Grey's Anatomy as Kathryn Heigl tried to come to grips with Denny's death was the first reason I paid attention to the song. I don't think there's been a more perfect use of a song in an episode of television. I cried, I've watched that scene multiple times over, I've purchased multiple versions of the song and Grey's just reused it in two different episodes as Derek Shepard died. That's how I know this particular song affected a lot of people, not just me.

The lyric, "Those three words are said too much, they're not enough" are my favorite. I assume they're talking about "I love you" when they refer to those three words. I connect with this on a deep level. It seems as though I love you has become too easy to say, easy to throw around and blurt out in a moment of passion, or a passing goodbye. Which got me thinking, what would I rather hear from my partner, lover, husband, mate, the one, instead of "I Love You"?

To me, I'm IN Love with you, has always felt bigger, more truthful. Its so easy to love someone, but to be IN love with someone, is breathtaking, life changing. Love is so powerful and to be able to step into LOVE with someone is what we're all hoping to experience in our lives, isn't it? To be IN love with someone intimates that you're in it together, that this is a dual experience, its not one sided, its reciprocated and you're on a magical journey together. Being IN Love with someone is a choice, not just a happenstance. Sure, we like to say I'm falling in love with you, because love can feel like that. Like you're suddenly hurtling towards an unknown experience with the wind in your hair, no control over where you'll land, if you'll land or if it will be a soft or a hard landing. If you're lucky you keep flying, catching bursts of wind that pull you back into the clouds, amongst the stars, dancing together.

Are there other phrases you would rather hear than I love you?

Here are some that I thought might be nice.

I can't breathe without you.
You compliment me better than anyone or anything.
You inspire me.
I don't want to live without you.
You Changed my Life.

Let's dance.

The scene that started it all.
https://youtu.be/tFgk9PfjKF8

The Extinction of Unexpected Couples? or How Online Dating is Going to Ruin the Fun for the Rest of Us.

Recently, a friend reached out to me with a brilliant idea, she was going to set me up on a blind date with a friend of hers that she thought I would hit it off with. I've never been on a blind date so I thought, what the heck, why not? I've been pretending to online date for the past few years, and I say pretend because I go back and forth between actually following up and putting my energy into it. Which, I get, defeats the purpose, but I can only get so excited about so many people and send them enlightened, enchanting messages, only to never hear back from them all the while receiving messages from the douche bag who leads with, "Want to fuck?" for so long.

Its disheartening, so I immediately jumped at the idea of getting set up by a friend who knows me, knows who I am, what I like and presumably knows the guy she has in mind for me and thought, hey, they'd make a cute couple.

My girl texted me and said, "Can I give your info to my friend?" to which I replied, "Of course." "Great, sending it now," she said.

I never heard from the guy. Naturally, I asked my friend what happened. And she said, "Oh, he only dates Asian girls." and since I am most definitely not Asian, I didn't even get the chance to meet him.

Fine, I don't NEED to waste my time on a guy who does not want to date me from the get-go, but I had an epiphany after this happened. If this, order exactly what you want, down to height, hair color, ethnicity, online dating continues, we are going to see the Unexpected, "Really, THEY'RE together", kind of couples go extinct.

I may not be Asian, but WHAT IF, the two of us met, sparks flew and we found the love of our lives in an unexpected place? He'd spend the rest of our relationship looking at me, thinking, "Wow. Who woulda thunk it?" And maybe people who knew him would think, "Whoa, I thought he only dated Asian girls, how weird that he would fall for a white girl." (Which boggles the mind on a whole other level, because when do we get to start falling in love with people's souls instead of their packaging? But that's a whole other rant.) And perhaps I would be thinking, "I never thought I'd fall for a guy who's shorter than me, but WOW, just being next to him excites me, challenges me, inspires me. . . it doesn't make sense, but it does."

No one understood Mila Kunis dating McCauley Culkin for so long, but something about it worked!

Online dating may be expanding our dating pool by giving us access to people we'd maybe never come across, but its also limiting our ideas about what is possible. I've met many guys from Online dating and it is amazing how many times I've been VERY into someone via text and email but the second we got in the same room, face to face and felt one another's energy we were like, Holy cow, this is not going to work and WHY did I send him those racy pics? And vice- versa, walked into a room, made eye contact with a complete stranger, felt that spark, that pull, the magnetism and the knowing that somehow they were going to be a significant part of my life, even though had I come across them online I'd have swiped left.

Open your minds, open your hearts, get your head out of your computer and be OPEN to the unknown, that, my friends is when life gets FUN!