It has been a rough start to the New Year. My family has suffered an immense loss. My cousin Kai, a funny, light, bright, sensitive, amazing person passed away on 1-3-2011. He had been sick with flu like symptoms for a few weeks and a severe infection took over his lungs. He went into cardiac arrest on 1-1-11 and while they got his heart to beat again, he never returned to this life.
Kai was funny, ridiculously funny, with such an incredible love for life. He lived everyday with such amusement and joy. He loved to make people laugh, to be outside, to spend time with his family, and to just be ridiculous. He was capable of an immense amount of love for all who came into his life. While Kai came into my family as a "step", his father married my Aunt, he and his sister, Jen, quickly became more than "Step" members of our family! The bond they formed with their "Step-Siblings" Liberty and Hunter, is stronger than most blood siblings I know.
What is it that makes losing someone so young harder than losing a person who has lived a long life? Not that losing a Grandparent or someone who is in their 80's is any easier, its just that you're almost, subconsciously ready for it, or prepared that someday soon they may be gone from your life. When the rug is ripped out from under you and suddenly your 37 year old cousin is gone, words can't describe the loss and sadness. The wondering? The questions? The WHY Kai? Why did he have to leave us?
Its hard but, I trust that he has a higher plan, that it was Kai's will to leave this planet and shine his bright light somewhere else. That he is needed somewhere else. I trust that there will always be a part of him that will live in my heart and the hearts of every life he touched. I know that my soul will encounter his again in another life, a different place, a new time.
As we've gone through this loss as a family, we are reminded that life is short, and its so important to truly connect with those you love and to tell them everyday just how important they are to you.
I would ask that right now, you take a moment and let the people in your life who are important to you know not just HOW much you love them, but WHY. What is it that they bring into your life? If I could talk to Kai again I would let him know how much joy and laughter and love he brought into my life every time I saw him. How important he was to me. I hope he knew that.
Don't let death remind you that its important to tell people you love them, that every moment you live your life, you should be IN the present moment, Hyper -aware of who you are connecting with, not texting, checking out or wishing you were somewhere else. There is no replacement for the love of family and friends. Our lives would be meaningless and frivolous without other souls to travel through life with, experience emotions, and connect with.
Go LIVE your life.
Go LAUGH out loud.
Go PLAY in nature.
Go SHARE your gifts with others.
Go CHERISH every relationship you have.
Otherwise, Kai is going to be pissed. I for one, do NOT need to be haunted by a playful spirit who I am sure has ALREADY figured out some crazy ways to haunt us. ; )
Publishing this blog at 11:11. Fitting.
Love.
